MiMo Boulevard

Boulevard of Reality

Just north of downtown Miami is a stretch of Biscayne Boulevard that defies understanding. From thirty sixth street to seventy ninth, more recently known as MIMO or Miami Modern is a stretch of swamp anchored on the south end by MAC a new public school in the old channel 10 building and the Boulevard Strip Joint on the north. Along the way is a charming blend of the residential and commercial that typify bayside living. From the tony gated Bay Point and leafy Morningside to the raunchy motels of days gone by, this stretch of tropics is ripe for commentary.

Crazy Is

The deco decals on the sidewalks are barely dry and already there are erratic markings that indicate where to tear up and dig down for some reason only FDOT could explain.

Shutter the Thought

Package Stores are a South Florida staple. Old sailors and missionaries still call them that as the word "package" was code for beer n alcohol. Where but in the land of Anita Bryant would the word "liquor" be so forbidden and the thought of wanting a drink before 12 noon on any given Sunday be tantamount to certain condemnation. Today the old booze businesses still abound but it is now ok to have display word signs.

PostCard Parade

Along this stretch of Boulevard, the dominant architectural elements are the old roadside motels that were popular with the budgeted crowds of snow-birds from a bygone era of fun in the sun. Here are just a few of the dilapidated postcard gems

Art Galleries are closing faster than whiskey bars in the middle east.

Church n Turf

How this New England house ended up next to a classic modern church is a testament to exactly why Biscayne Boulevard is so befuddling.

Havana Fascade

A box is just a box until the cuban builders do a mediterranean revival make-over on it. From Kendall to Aventura people are generally comfortable with this trolicalization of otherwise non-buildings.

Classic Modern Old

Q: Why does so much of Miami appear.... well just plain empty?

A: Because it is mostly swamp occasionally interrupted by attempts at architecture.

Smut Palace

You cant kill vice, it is as old as man.

Play It Again, Sergio

This is actually one of 79 street's best kept secrets, the little piano bar that could.

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FDOT WTF

Hopscotch for the Hopeless.

For three years residents and motorist along Biscayne Boulevard on Miami's Upper East Side grudgingly put up with the total demolition and re-building of the public commons. Business went out of business, traffic backed up for miles and the scheduled completion... well let's just say whatever.



It ain't over till it ain't over.

It's been less than a year since the roadwork was completed. Street life was decent again, businesses began to rebound from the rubble and tar hell. So imagine what a surprise to find work crews tearing up perfectly good sidewalks to build planters for trees.



Please Use Other Sidewalk?

Take a walk up the Boulevard... if you can avoid the obstacles. The planters are placed strategically so as to make the sidewalks rather People Un-Friendly. Who decides these things and where are they from, Planet Plunder?




Stupid Is.

And where they actually had created a perfectly good place to plop a palm... huh?!@%$ They just had to crush more concrete on the side. Like Bedrock City, it is now abundantly clear that Metro Dade is crazy about concrete and crushed rock.




It's Just a Job Mon.

People need jobs but the grunts get chump change while the contractors get filthy rich and the streets remain basically about the same. Maybe moneys would be better spent putting the guys through vocational training or assuring that their kids have other opportunities besides ditch digging menial laborers.




We Report, You Retort.

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a fond farewell to MiMo

After several years of discussion the Surfside community center is being demolished. The building was, like most things MiMo, mostly facade, fabulous but still just showy on the front. Today the official term for the ol' wrecking ball is de-constructed so as to not offend those who argued for a renovation rather than building a new facility. We really miss hanging out at the pool with the lovely ocean view and the little sand fleas.

Just down the street is the old Surf Club, a bastion of beach prestige. a picture of Winston Churchill dabbling with paint greets visitors. The club's classic style predates mimo and is still quite presentable today... and just as tough to get in though.



Out with the New, In with the Old.

Cinco de Whato?

Update: it was a treat to see people taking to the street on biscayne to celebrate the end of two years of road construction that has been a DOT blight on the community.

If there is anything in miami that is not modern, it is the swamp.
The MiMo Biscayne Association was created to attract new people to the Upper East Side and save what is worth saving of my old neighborhood. Their motto is "progress through preservation".... (aka disneyfication). This weekend their "Cinco de MiMo" Festival got off to a fine start with a crush kick-off party and other events sure to be fun for all. But the name of the festival has a discordant tone that is ironic and symptomatic of our times in the MiamiModernMindset. This well-intended festival has nothing to do with the original "Cinco de Mayo" which btw has nothing to do with mayonnaise but still has a curious history:

...the modern American focus on that day first started in California in the 1860s in response to the resistance to French rule in Mexico.[6] The paper notes that "The holiday, which has been celebrated in California continuously since 1863, is virtually ignored in Mexico."


painting by adolfo