Surfside - Simply Splendid

Why are there few tributes or monuments in Surfside or Miami Beach honoring past political leaders?  Perhaps it is because they are seldom worth the attention once done "serving" the public. 

This resort town paradise is an island of mischief in an ocean of misgivings.  We don't call it swamp for nothing.

Surfside 1935: Local residents obtain state approval and create an independent municipality, the Town of Surfside, based on their desire to maintain a community with independence from Miami Beach and to have a small, accountable, and efficient local government to reflect the priorities and well being of its own residents. Over the 7 decades to follow, Surfside has its ups and downs, but generally does a superb job at serving its residents, remaining debt free, and being a widely recognized example for cities and towns and villages all over the nation.

But something happened after the flamingos, alligators and mangrove were evicted.  Yes, the lowest animal took up residence, and I'm not talking mosquitos.  

Currently there is a special election underway as a result of one fine fellow marching to his own drummer.  For those who give a hoot,  commissioner Sheldon Libsbon rode into office recently on a wave of exasperated voters and under-the-table special interest push-back.  But no sooner did he win a seat that he then decided to quit and run for state office.  As fate would have it and not surprising, he lost... boohoo.

Eli Tourgeman, Joseph Graubart and Meredith Beattie — have qualified to take his place in a special election to be held Aug. 28.
But his sudden exit, two months after the swearing-in ceremony, angered and surprised commissioners and many town residents and will likely cost Surfside up to $20,000 for a special election to replace him.

This from Google:

ADL letter to Sheldon J. Lisbon for a real shocker. His apology to the ADL will also show up, but he offers no apology to voters in Florida District 100 which he wants to represent. We should all ask: if his words said in anger are his "true feelings". Re: June 2012 Commission meeting where he verbally attacked with his (aggitated voice rising) Commissioner Marta Olchyk who said she was disappointed in him for resigning his Commission seat after being elected in March.

Here's the thing.  There are many signs around Surfside these days.  Mostly roadwork signs thanks to the current administration and their hell-bent desire to re-do everything that is buried underground.  This means tear up everything that was not broken above ground.  Ultimately what will be broke will be the town's bank accounts.

The other visual pollution is all the political signs paid for by candidate Eli Tourgeman (  signs not pictured here).  Old Eli has a date with destiny but he also has plenty of bagage and obviously tons of Hutzpah.  old-timer neighbors know exactly what I'm talking about... 

Surfside 1990 - 1992: Mayor Eli Tourgeman enacts foolish budget policies with a 3-2 vote of his Town Commission that put the Town into the red, ending his term with town deficits. Tourgeman supports a number of major zoning variances and tries to break down the zoning code to get approval for a 20 story condo despite a height limit in the code of 12 stories. The voters turned back Toureman's approval in a referendum that defeated and reversed the condo project's variance approval. In 1990 he was elected mayor, in 1992 he was voted off of the commission when voters saw his real priorities and he came in last from a field of 10 candidates.

The other front-runner is seasoned regular guy Joe Graubart.  Neighbor, activist, organizer and all around too-nice-to-fail,  Joe said to me recently that he is back in the game in an effort to throw interference at corruption.  He wants to put the brakes on self-serving special interests intent on capitalizing on what makes Surfside special. That being our restrictions on building height and density, our non-denominational demographic nature and our ability to sustain a safe family-friendly neighborhood affordably. 

Swampstyle endorses Joe Graubart for Commissioner.

Not to bemoan Tourgeman he has done some good albeit not enough to make up for the bad.

THE 6TH ANNUAL PARENTS HUNT FOR ART, HOSTED BY THE SURFSIDE BUSINESS ASSOCIATION AND THE SURFSIDE TOURIST BOARD,

“THE GOAL OF THE PROGRAM IS TO MOTIVATE YOUNG CHILDREN TO TAKE PRIDE IN WHAT THEY ARE DOING AND TO SEE THEIR ART BEING DISPLAYED IN PUBLIC PLACES”, SAYS ITS CREATOR ELI TOURGEMAN, PRESIDENT OF THE SURFSIDE BUSINESS ASSOCIATION AND FORMER MAYOR OF SURFSIDE. ” THE PROGRAM HAS BEEN VERY SUCCESSFUL BECAUSE IT MOTIVATES THE PARENTS AND THE CHILDREN IN THE HUNT, ITS A BOND FOR PASSION OF THE ARTS.”

( picture not related )

The third candidate we will call the spoiler is Meredith, something or other .  She entered the race just in time, seems to be doing everything right. According to her web site you can meet her at a pre-arranged coffee clutch.  But here is the thing, according to Tourgeman she has lived in Surfside since 2004 but has never voted at any election.  Go figure...

I don't need to tell you that Surfside is special, and if elected, I will use my decade of public administration experience and your insights to guide decision-making to protect our way of life. I would be delighted to share more of my qualifications in person and you can always email me at meredethbeattie. I respectfully ask for your vote for #600 Meredith Beattie on August 28 and, if elected, will honor your trust, listen to your opinion, and steward your hopes for our community.  

Honestly, I can't blame Meredith for not ever voting considering this passage:

Quite simply, South Florida is corrupt and weird -- and it is these things to such an extent that its residents are cynical about local politics and politicians. South Floridians know full well how corrupt and opportunistic their politicians are; but trying to uproot them is like whacking moles -- swat one, and another pops up elsewhere. In such an environment, a healthy dose of cynicism is only rational.

Meanwhile the dust of Surfside remains unsettled.  The big issues are this vacant commissioner seat, the endless infrastructure upgrade, the green-lighting of another mega-temple, the over-development of the historic sites SurfClub, BestWestern, Surfside-6 and the degradation of the environment. 

I am glad to deliver a bit of good news from across the bay,  the beach in Surfside is Simply Splendid by day, and the town is tranquil and starry by night.

 What remains now is who will get that hot seat at town hall...

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If it ain't broke, break it.

The Town of Surfside is still a nice enough place to live. It encapsulates why people move to South Florida. Essentially they do so on the promise of a lifestyle paved with affordable luxury.

Folk mostly just want to be left alone behind a thick curtain of ficus, a fragile fortress of illusion.

All is fine so long as the maintenance is kept up, so long as our elected leaders look out for our collective best interest, take care of the people's business.

The mandate is status quo, out with the old and in with the new. This means mortgaging the family farm while ignoring fiscal responsibility, disregarding the urgency of frugality.

Concurrently Surfside is now hawked up to its sand dunes in capital improvement costs for the promise a cleaner care-free future, an indeterminate tomorrow that will never arrive for whomever is here later. Those who follow will bear the burden of their own version of progress, i guarantee it.

We today are in the throws of tearing up our otherwise quite streets and replacing all the water and waste systems to the tune of millions and counting. We are using miles of cheap plastic tubing that has a life expectancy of 30 years. Funny when discussing budget approval,no one mentioned externalized costs such as car wash compensation or diminished lung capacity due to yucky air quality in an otherwise really clean place.

Bottom line is we now live in a dirty slow world of diversions, detours, rubble, delays and dust. yet in fairness to the planners the elaborate infrastructure upgrade operation is proceeding marvelously according to neighbors who embrace progress for the sake of a betterment, whatever that means.

Enough said of compliance and complacency. Finally, be sure if you park here, it is no more than 12 inches from the curb or else...

Irony has its signs.

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Eye on Surfside

Church of Chance

A harbinger of thing to come is sometimes found in the most unsuspecting places. Such is this sign for a place of worship located in an unassuming neighborhood in a city that is on the verge of a precipice called legalized gambling. Scripture says odds are when the cat's asleep the rats will reap.

Three Ring Circus

Interestingly, here below are several comments posted by anonymouse on the state of things in the quiet little Town of Surfside. A place many residents still consider Simply Splendid. But lately the concern for some is, for how long?

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "A Hotel Is Not a Home":

Soon after one zoning blowout project was approved for 92nd Street, another developer – going under a newly assumed name – proposed an even larger hotel for Collins Avenue and 94th Street, a scheme to more than triple the size of the pre-existing hotel on that property. Just before asking for huge zoning increases, the developer made a little “donation” of $15,000 (for a $10,000 fireworks display!) that the Town Manager wanted to fund from the ‘outside’. The Town Manager and Town Attorney tried to keep the identity of the “donor” secret. The property was purchased for $25 Million - a price far higher then currently appraised – because the buyer knew – in advance – that the property would quickly be vastly upzoned to accommodate maximum private profits. The property was purchased in cash, no financing reported. The Town Attorney, Town Manager, and ‘Town Planner’ all pushed and it was “approved” 4-1 despite major violations of the Town Charter. The attorneys for the developer? The same ones as for the developer of the first bloated project, the ones who are also the lawyers for the “Town Planner” an outside contractor company - and they also represent the “Town Engineer”. “Town Engineer”? That very same outside company, now replacing all water and sewer pipes in the entire town at a cost of over $16 million dollars (+ $9 million more for interest and fees). New water/sewer system? The cover story is about leaky old pipes, but no other community in the country is replacing and increasing the capacity of its entire system. Pipes could have been lined – inner coated - to seal leaks. It is really about more capacity, bigger pipes -facilitating major new overdevelopment. They changed zoning laws, denied citizens the right to vote – a right guaranteed by the Town Charter - and they are using public money to try to remove any issues of ‘utility concurrency’.

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "Surf and Turf":

Surfside’s hidden methods and agendas are unraveling. Officials are starting to realize that the public really did have a right to know all along and that right was trampled. So was residents' right to vote on big zoning increases. Little known but true that departing town employees are being forced to sign non-disclosure agreements to keep their mouths shut about Town Hall dealings. In 2011 Surfside Florida seems to be ‘leading the nation’ as a web of undisclosed conflicts of interest and ethically impaired government.

There are paper trails to examine of records independently posted on government and publicly accessible web sites. A connected group with friends at Town Hall started work in 2006 and continue working today. They asked Surfside officials to change zoning laws to enable a far more dense project with more units, smaller units, less parking, more mass of building, more height, and changes in permitted uses, for a group of 5 lots at 92nd Street & A1A across from the ocean. All without the referendum required by the Town Charter. They got together with some hired guns with bought and paid for 'opnions' to say that there was no Charter violation even though it was there to be seen if anyone really looked.

The developer is represented by a particular law firm, which proposed zoning changes to the “Town Planner”. The Town Planner is a company, an outside contractor. This same company has obtained numerous contracts from the Surfside Administration with no competition. Dozens of no-competition contracts for millions of dollars of public funds. The “company” assigned one of its employees to act as Surfside's “Town Planner”.

The developer’s law firm made proposals for zoning changes which were presented to the “Town Planner” in a series of private, closed door meetings. Simultaneously they conducted dozens of scripted, controlled “public meetings” with pre-set agendas giving no public notice of the major changes being made, and with no actual public participation other than full fledged members of the ‘plan’, all marching towards manipulated and predetermined outcomes.

The same lawyers represent both the developers and the Company that is the “town planner” – and those same lawyers are former partners of the Town Attorney. How's that for an inside job?

And the same company is also the "Town Engineer" doing a 16 million dollar project to expand water and sewer capacity to allow for more and more and more overdevelopment. Cozy?

* swampstyle does not necessarily endorse the opinions of commenters.

A Hotel Is Not a Home

Taking a swim in the splendid waters of South Florida, one would think there are no problems in paradise. A daily dunk in the Atlantic is by far the single most rejuvenating lifestyle choice in the swamp. Yes there is the occasional tide of jellyfish or obnoxious tourists on Jetskis but the trouble begins where the ocean ends as the sands of time drift to earth-bound dilemmas. Sussing out the poop from the paradise is the domain of watchdogs and naysayers. The muted sirens are the whistleblowers.

From the rubble of the old Surfside Community Center arose the new phoenix of family fun facility. The town is thumping its chest with self-congratulatory cliche, but the new center will not resuscitate the old heart of the community that was plowed over with the demolition of the old. The new place must win new hearts and new minds to endue itself a sense of home.

Gone with the classic MiMo architectural gem is the town's quaint library, the cheesy snack bar, the swim team and the kids that are soon away to college. Gone are the guests of residents now no longer permitted by the town's new policy of exclusion. With that said, there is a new dawn in Surfside, albeit with many of the same old players.

In the interest of transparency, inclusion and whatever, here below is a comment verbatim on the state of local affairs as opined by one anonymous contributor recently. I am only the messenger:

"Federal money being corrupted. State and local money being corrupted. Where is it going - there is no outside view. All information comes from Surfside Town Hall. Is it credible? Accurate? Or not. How many layers of smoke and blankets are covering up where the money has gone, where it is going, and who is ending up with it. "Contributions" in exchange for zoning "favors"? Changing laws and systems to facilitate administrators and lawyers selling the public out to avarice?

Since the birth of America, men and women have fought and died to protect our nation, our democracy, and our right to vote. Our community here in Surfside Florida has traditionally recognized Independence Day, Veterans Day, and Memorial Day and honored our nation, its military and veterans,through times of both war and peace and we are proud of our town’s long standing ideals. lf only they were not being disrespected by our own town government.

On this day in 2011 we must sadly recognize that right here in our own community, the Town of Surfside, we are being denied the right to vote. Denied the very rights that Independence Day is all about. Town officials have adamantly refused to comply with the Town Charter and as a result we have not been allowed to have a referendum — no public votes - on critically important matters such as:

—- dozens of no-bid contracts given out, siphoning off & depleting the town’s savings

-— the needless demolition and destruction of the beautiful, historic Community Center

-- the expenditure of millions of dollars of town savings (far more than is being admitted to by Town Hall) for demolition and to build a new and smaller Community Center with no Auditorium or Library, to be run on a deficit basis

—— the sell-out and complete changing of the Town's zoning code to vastly increase allowable development, density and congestion

—— the Town going into debt for 16 million dollars plus 9 million in interest and fees to replace the entire water and sewer system to expand capacity for future development in Bal Harbour and Surfside while simultaneously soaking our residents with enormiously increased, oppressive water and sewer bills.

Surfside is being run far more like a dictatorship than as a participatory democracy. Town officials provide cover for the drain of town money, and they let developers write zoning laws to suit their agenda.

Special interests reign and manipulate all official decisions.

lt is a disgrace that we have been refused the right to vote on such crucial issues. The community has been permanently damaged as a result. We need help! to have our Town Hall return to the ways of the Public Interest and to abandon its current priority of serving special interests at our expense.

Our wallets, and our quality of life, are being ripped off!

Don’t be deceived by town officials’ false, contrived, bullying rhetoric."

Do we see a parade of cement truck in our near future ? Only the schmoracle knows.

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Surf and Turf

At sunset this past father's day, some folks on the beach must have thought the Town of Surfside was a bit early with their Fourth of July fireworks display.

Who but the residents of this slow-paced seaside town would know that the celebration was for the much anticipated soft opening of our grand new community center.

Nearly six years ago, setting aside a nostalgia for worn and familiar, town interests bullishly moved forward with the costly controversial demolition of a perfectly old building and the new construction of a bigger, better oasis. Trouble was the ambitious plan was often compared to the re-invention of the wheel. The project seemed to languish with the southern drawl of small town bureaucracy, distracting promise of a sunnier tomorrow and finally the sentimental loss of a fragile connectedness with neighbors.

The heat was on to get work done on time for the promised grand opening. With hardhat nipping and tucking frenzy, manual labor pressed the site into service and the official ribbon cutting went off without a hitch, kinda.

One interior space puzzlingly resembling a Sobe sitting room, a charming long-time resident stood confounded by the new glass enclosure smelling very now where our quiet old library once stood. She made a graceful perplexing smile when i told her we were standing in what will one day be a virtual media center with kindles.

Volunteers dressed in commemorative tee's hurriedly posed for a snapshot before scurrying for cover from impending thunderhead storms. Soon after an Early Lightning Warning Siren system was triggered signaling the evacuation command with 'the russians are coming' screeching blasts.

Father figures of Surfside, Mayor Dietch and Cub Scout Master Howard ushered in the new era of community vitality. These guys are comfortably smart, fair, casual and reassuring.

Surfy and Turfy, locals gather in support of the not so wild side.

Time will tell how well this shiny new shell will accommodate the diverse needs and desires of the residents who fund its existence. Our next big ticket item is the revamping of the town plumbing.

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Surf and Turf

Luther Campbell bumper stickers flooding Dade County roads. Uncle Luke is a candidate for our times because sadly Blow-Fly is too old to run for Mayor of Miami. The county has already lost its shirt, now is the time to roll with Luke's Luck, we have nothing to loosen but our pants.

For many longtime residents, South Florida living has always percolated along irrespective of the slurry of political news from downtown and from afar on teevee or the grapevine. Folks are like that all over the world but Miami is #1 for pervasive oblivious apathy.

The Town of Surfside was incorporated 75 years ago. Soon after the town Social Center was established. No doubt it catered to a "select crowd" of whites only.

Some years later, the town Social Center moved and changes its name to the Community Center. As decades unfolded, an new policy of accommodation and inclusion fostered understanding among residents, their guests and visiting tourists eager to enjoy our beautiful sun and surf. We had our very own Library. Children took swim classes . National holidays were celebrated. At election time, we voted there. Grilled cheese sandwiches were $1.50.

Several years ago, a decision was made by devious politicians to demolish the building before funding was secured for new construction. The ill conceived blunder not only destroyed the classic modern architecture but also tore apart the fragile symbiotic social fabric of our community. Sadly without a central meeting place, I have no idea who our neighbors are today.

As the wheels of progress grind slow with the drag of bureaucratic sludge, three years have passed. Two administrations later, the town is poised with pride for the much anticipated grand opening of our paired down new state of the art social center.

Hispanic workers that built this ultra-fancy structure must have wondered what on earth the architects were thinking when they designed this parabolic pagoda of glass and concrete. I think at least one senior at the firm is a big star-trek freak... and that's a good thing.

Here is a sneak peek of the of the aquatic features formerly known as pools. The basins are wedges that taper from a tarmac as if to mimic the oceans shore. Trouble is, they put the pool on the south end of the site where it will be in the shade of the neighboring condo tower for most of the winter months.

The facility is essentially a giant table about the size of a soccer field with a "blow-away" glass underside. The old place had something of a rooftop deck. Perhaps the new place will make use of the increased square footage for Trump to land his helicopter.

All smart new construction must have a round thing and plucked palms.

Surfside is a well kept secret. We tolerate the multitudes of mainlander beach crowds that trash North Shore Park and Haulover Beach, we begrudgingly accept the overdevelopment of Sunny Isles, the snobbery of Bal Harbour Mall and Aventura, we flick a finger at the thievery of North Bay Village and their red-light cameras. It has become increasingly difficult to maintain the level of tranquility and quality of life that made this place our blessing. But Surfside is primed to usher in a new chapter in its quiet history. We welcome you with SPF 75.

Trouble is, every time something gets build, there is more concrete and less green.

The swamp has been paved over and over.

Pleasing to look at and offering shade, a palm is not a tree. Palms are part of the grass family.

Site of the old Surfside Six Motel where a new proposed hotel issue is in the final throws of a controversial confrontation between developer and 600 residents. This you can read about in the local news.

The Miami Herald

The article, "Surfside approved controversial hotel project" by Angel L. Doval, in the Sunday, May 15 Neighbors section omitted critically important information and a very compelling presentation made by attorney Tucker Gibbs and zoning expert Mark Alvarez, given at the behest of the Surfside Residents Association (SRA), and therefore only told half the story. Documents and a PowerPoint presentation allege that the Town of Surfside 2004 Charter Amendment 4, that passed with a 92 percent voter approval and which limits a development’s height, density and intensity was “broken”, thus calling for a “vote of the people” via referendum.

To my great disappointment, the most controversial item to appear in front of this commission to date had two absent members; Mayor Dietch and Commissioner Karukin. Mr. Dietch, a strong supporter of this project, was the town’s planning and zoning chairman for four years and not only missed the opportunity to cast his vote, but also the liberty to challenge the presentation as well.

The vote taken on a matter of such importance, with only three members of the commission present, represents a sad day for Surfside governance.

Joseph “Joe” Graubart

Vice mayor, Surfside

The business end of Surfside. Perfect everyday.

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